AcousticByLines Quotes, Jokes, Stories

Quotes, Jokes, Stories

Please don't read these pages if you are easily offended.

Quotes about the Other Arts

"Putting together a piece of art is more than creating something that is aesthetically beautiful, although that's part of it. You have to put meaning in it, and to do that ... you have to know yourself and truly know what you believe." — Michael Lente, quoted by Megan Kimble, "One to Watch / Michael Lente, creative writing and art," University of Denver Magazine, Summer 2008

"...a new kind of interactive fiction. These narratives unfold in fragments, in all sorts of media, from Web sites to phone calls to live events, and the audience pieces together the story from shards of information. The task is too complicated for any one person, but the Web enables a collective intelligence to emerge to assemble the pieces, solve the mysteries, and in the process, tell and retell the story online. The narrative is shaped—and ultimatelyowned—by the audience in ways that other forms of story tellingcannont match. No longer passive consumers, the players live out the story. Eight years ago, this kind of entertainment didn't exist; now dozens of such games are launched every year, many of them attracting millions of followers on every continent." — Frank Rose, "This Buzz for You," Wired magazine, Jan 2008

"...inspired by the spectacular sunsets visible from his new home, our here takes up painting—but through his newfound talent he soon discovers he can channel both secrets of the past...and scary visions of the future.'Okay, buddy, put down the brush and step away from the easel...'" — review of Stephen King's novel Duma Key, "Navigator," AARP magazine, March&April 2008

"Life may not be the party we hoped for,but while we`re here we should dance." — unknown

"In the isolated farmland counties of eastern Nebraska, where it is not uncommon to drive 30 miles for groceries, polka helps tie people together. The dances and the radio shows devoted to the music keep old friends in touch and circulate local news. But the music has been slowly fading since the 1980s as the farming population in Nebraska shrinks. 'It's our generation's fault,' said Darlene Kliment, 68, who owns the Starlite Ballroom west of Omaha with her husband, Ron. 'When we were growing up, our parents would take us to the dances. We'd fall asleep on the side of the stage, or in the booths. But then when our generation grew up, we got babysitters.'" — "In Focus: The last dance," The Denver Post, December 30, 2007

"I just wanted to take a moment and thank the Writers Guild for their strike. It has forced television networks to play older shows and reruns that are of a better quality than any of the current shows have. Thanks for making TV good again — I hope you all continue striking!" — Rich Passarelli, Aurora, Perspective, The Denver Post, December 30, 2007

"Winter is an etching, spring a watercolor, summer an oil painting and autumn a mosaic of them all." — Stanley Horowitz, answer to Celebrity Cipher, Colorado Springs Gazette, Dec 22, 2007

"The Arts teach us nothing except the significance of life." — Henry Miller, quoted in a Stinson Morrison Hecker LLP ad

"The Arts allow us to discover who we can be." — Northern Trust ad

"We should consider every day lost on which we have not danced at least once. And we should call every truth false which was not accompanied by at least one laugh." — Friedrich Nietzsche, quoted by David Baird, A Thousand Paths to Happiness

"Life is rather like acting lessons while you are on stage giving a public performance!" — David Baird, A Thousand Paths to Happiness

"It was a career-defining moment. It defined that fact that I still have something that passes for a career." — Jim Ratts, Oct 31, 2007

"An athlete cannot run with money in his pockets. He must run with hope in his heart and dreams in his head." — Emil Zapotek, answer to Celebrity Cipher, Colorado Springs Gazette, Nov. 5, 2007

"Great art picks up where nature ends." — Marc Chagall, answer to Celebrity Cipher, Colorado Springs Gazette, Nov. 1, 2007

"Laughter is the glue of creation." — unknown

"All art is quite useless." — Oscar Wilde

"A man paints with his brains not with his hands." — Michelangelo

"You've achieved success in your field when you don't know whether what you're doing is work or play." — Warren Beatty (answer to 6/29/07 Celebrity Cipher)

"The aim of art is to represent not the outward appearance of things, but their inward significance." — Aristotle (answer to 6/28/07 Celebrity Cipher)

"Founders: Bands, Singers, Songwriters, Solo Performers, Sidemen, Instrumentalists, Performers, Entertainers, Musicians, Places to Hear Acoustic Music, Locations, Venues, Clubs, Festivals, Business and Services Supporting Acoustic Music, Music Stores, Musical Instruments, Music Teachers Ernie [Martinez Ernie Martinez: Bands, Singers, Songwriters, Solo Performers, Sidemen, Instrumentalists, Performers, Entertainers, Musicians] doesn't read minds. He waits for the movie." — Jim Ratts

Bob Hope on his career:

  • ON GIVING UP HIS EARLY CAREER, BOXING "I ruined my hands in the ring ... the
    referee kept stepping on them."
  • ON NEVER WINNING AN OSCAR "Welcome to the Academy Awards or, as it's called at my home, 'Passover'."
  • ON GOLF "Golf is my profession. Show business is just to pay the green fees."
  • ON RECEIVING THE CONGRESSIONAL GOLD MEDAL "I feel very humble, but I think I have the strength of character to fight it."
  • ON HIS SIX BROTHERS "That's how I learned to dance. Waiting for the bathroom."
  • ON GOING TO HEAVEN "I've done benefits for ALL religions. I'd hate to blow the hereafter on a technicality."

submitted by Founders: Bands, Singers, Songwriters, Solo Performers, Sidemen, Instrumentalists, Performers, Entertainers, Musicians, Places to Hear Acoustic Music, Locations, Venues, Clubs, Festivals, Business and Services Supporting Acoustic Music, Music Stores, Musical Instruments, Music Teachers Bob Turner Bob Turner: Bands, Singers, Songwriters, Solo Performers, Sidemen, Instrumentalists, Performers, Entertainers, Musicians

"Even as a listener and fan, I have to pace myself. We get 'burn out' on this side of the fence, too." — Kim Davison

"... look at the list of liberals who are active in politics, if not running. Barbra Streisand, Sean Penn, Warren Beatty, Springsteen, Spielberg... And then you look at the conservatives, it's like Chuck Norris, Bo Derek and the Gatlin Brothers. I don't know if being liberal makes you more right, but it does seem like it makes you more talented." — Bill Maher, submitted by
Founders: Bands, Singers, Songwriters, Solo Performers, Sidemen, Instrumentalists, Performers, Entertainers, Musicians, Places to Hear Acoustic Music, Locations, Venues, Clubs, Festivals, Business and Services Supporting Acoustic Music, Music Stores, Musical Instruments, Music Teachers Bob Turner Bob Turner: Bands, Singers, Songwriters, Solo Performers, Sidemen, Instrumentalists, Performers, Entertainers, Musicians

"In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice, there is." — Joe DiMaggio

"I want to move to theory. Everything works in theory." — Stuart Tarbuck

"The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense." — Tom Clancy (as quoted in "Don't Follow The Rules", James Van de Walle, Women's Edition, Sept 2004

"You learn this great lesson of life: it's not about me. It's just not. The matter of talent—which seemed so important to you when you were young—is not of great importance. We're simply a conduit. We take things out of the air into us and put them in the form of stories. That's pretty much it." — Garrison Keillor, "Keillor Instinct", AARP Magazine, March&April, 2005

"A German shepherd dog could walk in the office with a script in his mouth, and if that script was really good, they'd buy the script." — Peter Guber, chairman of Mandalay Entertainment, in "Hollywood to Writers: You're Fired!" by Barbara Basler, AARP Bulletin, Jan 2005

"Guber says that's not age discrimination. 'You're actually making a judgment of who's more likely to execute the material in a manner that will address the audience you want to reach.'" in "Hollywood to Writers: You're Fired!" by Barbara Basler, AARP Bulletin, Jan 2005

"I never watched Friends, maybe because it was written by people straight out of college....The only way to avoid age discrimination in Hollywood is to die young." — Larry Gelbart, creator of M*A*S*H, in "Hollywood to Writers: You're Fired!" by Barbara Basler, AARP Bulletin, Jan 2005

"We don't need anyone over 50 years of age to succeed with our business plan." — former Fox Broadcasting president Jamie Kellner, in "Hollywood to Writers: You're Fired!" by Barbara Basler, AARP Bulletin, Jan 2005

"It's a myth that older writers can't write for younger audiences. Shakespeare wasn't 15 when he wrote Romeo and Juliet." — Tracy Keenan Wynn, in "Hollywood to Writers: You're Fired!" by Barbara Basler, AARP Bulletin, Jan 2005

"Once you hit 40, you can't do it anymore. Who's got this energy to go on three hours of sleep? You just can't do it." — Marta Kauffman, TV executive and co-creator of the hit television series Friends, in "Hollywood to Writers: You're Fired!" by Barbara Basler, AARP Bulletin, Jan 2005

"A comedy writer who asked not to be named wanted a young writer to 'front' for him. 'But,' he recalls, 'I didn't know any young writers. And I didn't want to hang around outside writing schools saying, Hey, come here kid, i've got a script to show you.'" — in "Hollywood to Writers: You're Fired!" by Barbara Basler, AARP Bulletin, Jan 2005

"On Nov. 13, 1850, Robert Louis Stevenson, author of 'Treasure Island' and 'Doctor Jekyll and Mr. Hyde,' is born in Scotland. Stevenson's decision to pursue a career as a writer alienated his parents, who expected him to follow the family trade of lighthouse keeping." — "Moments in time, The History Channel", in Tidbits of Northern El Paso County, November 8, 2004

"Listening to radio was like group meditation or a moment of silence in church. You can't get the same effect with TV unless you're very drunk." — Jackson Beck, the man who regularly introduced Superman to radio fans, as told to Newsweek, via Founders: Bands, Singers, Songwriters, Solo Performers, Sidemen, Instrumentalists, Performers, Entertainers, Musicians, Places to Hear Acoustic Music, Locations, Venues, Clubs, Festivals, Business and Services Supporting Acoustic Music, Music Stores, Musical Instruments, Music Teachers Bob Turner
Bob Turner: Bands, Singers, Songwriters, Solo Performers, Sidemen, Instrumentalists, Performers, Entertainers, Musicians

"Dyslexic poets write inverse." — John Licht

"On a personal note, I remember observing, some 40+ years ago, that one reason I was a good dancing teacher was that I had only limited talent. Because my talent was limited, I encountered most of the problems that the average dancing student encountered. Because I had *some* talent, I could solve those problems. Because I could communicate (a key requirement for any teacher) I could tell others how to solve those problems. (A 'natural' talent never encounters the problems, and therefore doesn't know the solutions.)" — Bob Dolan (of Simon Pure Simon Pure: Bands, Singers, Songwriters / Composers, Solo Performers, Sidemen, Instrumentalists, Performers, Entertainers, Musicians)

"We found that people receive more enduring pleasure and satisfaction from investing in life experiences than material possessions," says [Leaf Van] Boven, and assistant psychology professor [at the University of Colorado]." — Linda Castrone, "In the end, we always go back to the classics", Denver Post, April 26, 2004

"Popular culture has always been moronic. It has to be, by mathematics. I mean, one-half of the population is by definition below median intelligence." — P. J. O'Rourke

"Great dancers are not great because of their technique, they are great because of their passion." — Martha Graham, submitted by Founders: Bands, Singers, Songwriters, Solo Performers, Sidemen, Instrumentalists, Performers, Entertainers, Musicians, Places to Hear Acoustic Music, Locations, Venues, Clubs, Festivals, Business and Services Supporting Acoustic Music, Music Stores, Musical Instruments, Music Teachers Mark Merryman
Mark Merryman: Bands, Singers, Songwriters, Solo Performers, Sidemen, Instrumentalists, Performers, Entertainers, Musicians

"Remember, Art is not just another man's name." — John Macey, according to Founders: Bands, Singers, Songwriters, Solo Performers, Sidemen, Instrumentalists, Performers, Entertainers, Musicians, Places to Hear Acoustic Music, Locations, Venues, Clubs, Festivals, Business and Services Supporting Acoustic Music, Music Stores, Musical Instruments, Music Teachers Ernie Martinez Ernie Martinez: Bands, Singers, Songwriters, Solo Performers, Sidemen, Instrumentalists, Performers, Entertainers, Musicians

"Critics can't even make music by rubbing their back legs together." — Mel Brooks, submitted by Stuart Tarbuck

"Anyone who thinks sunshine is happiness has never danced in the rain." — Unknown

"'Isuzu' means '50 bells' in Japanese." — unknown, Southeast Tidbits, Dec. 9, 2002

"We do not stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing." — unknown

"Boxing is like ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other." — attributed to Jack Handey by Stuart Tarbuck

"If you can't get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you best teach it to dance." — George Bernard Shaw

"We're fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance." — Confucius

Slogan of a country radio station in Kansas: "Am I a winner, or what?"

Slogan of 105.9, the classic rock radio station in Chicago: "Of all the radio stations in Chicago, we're one of them."

"...when the schtick hits the fans ..." — Joe Jewel

"Those who danced were thought to be quite insane by those who could not hear the music." — Angela Monet, from the Spring 2001 Swallow Hill Music Association Quarterly

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